What Has Happened to My Heart?

It's a beautiful Minnesota day! The last several inches of new snow still sits on top of everything and glitters in the bright February sun. This morning I heard the birds singing their "summer" songs - a sure sign that Spring is coming soon! There is a warm fire going in our woodstove, and I'm still in my p.j.'s at almost 1:30 p.m.! I should be moving forward into this day with the anticipation of getting the house cleaned, the school week wrapped up and getting ready for all the weekend holds. I should be "engaged" with my home schooled son, involved with the activities of my high-schooled son, looking forward to church and ministry opportunities coming up ... my heart and thoughts "should be" in the present ... here ... in MN ... in my family ... in my life, but it's not.

Since January 12th, my heart has become connected to Haiti, it's people and issues, and those whose hearts and lives were already there before the earthquake. I've come to know several individuals, couples, families, ministries and groups whose lives have been forever affected by Haiti and by this earthquake. And I've become "consumed" with reading about Haiti, following the lives of the precious people that I've come to know, and discovering many more every day. I've never been where they've been and didn't experience what they did. Yet my every thought, day and night, is "with" them! How can I be so full of their pain, their questions, their struggle to understand and go on? It's not my life. I've never been there. I am not connected to anyone in Haiti. I haven't adopted children from there (or anywhere else). It's really "not my problem". So, why do I care so much? Is it "wrong" for me to be so involved? Should I just quit reading all the blogs, news, discussions, etc. and just "get on" with my life?

Maybe I care so much because God cares so much. His word says that "we love because He first loved us" (I John 4:19). If I remain in Him, close to His heart, I can't help but love those He loves.

I have to pray. And then, I need to pray some more. But when I find myself stuck "in the mire", I need to walk away and go sit in the sunshine for awhile and let the Son shine down on me. I need to get His perspective again. I need to rest in His peace again. If I continue to just look at "the storm", all I will see is the wind, the rain, the mess, the struggle, the vastness of it all. I have to lift my eyes to the One from whom my help (and the help of those whose burden I bear) comes from.

I have to come back to the only thing that is true and the only thing that matters. Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life. His love is greater than anything we can think or imagine. He is all we need. His word is true. I will "cast all my cares on Him (and the cares/needs of those I pray for) because He cares for (us)".